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Relationships are a great thing, they make us feel fulfilled and Cherished, they can bring us happiness and they can bring us sadness. They make us feel loved and wanted and can motivate you to achieve anything you want too.

But relationships are strange, you start to loose that single confident self and become so lost in another persons identity, most of the time this will happen without you even realising; you go from being ‘Chloe’ to Chloe and Brian’. How many you are guilty of loosing friendships over a guy?! I know I am.

Loosing yourself in a relationship is the worst about falling in love, so how do you stop it?

Make time for yourself

When a new relationship first becomes a thing, it’s natural to go from spending all of your time by yourself to wanting to spending all of your free time with your partner. That’s completely understandable, it’s new and exciting and you will want to be around them all of the time. but it’s just as important to schedule in some ‘me’ time, you can read up on my best tips on how to fit this time in to your busy schedule. It doesn’t have to be over the top, it can be simply treating yourself to a bath and some candles before you go to bed.

Spend time apart

Getting a good balance between spending time with your friends and family alone and spending time with your partner can be difficult, but just because your in a relationship doesn’t mean your social life should change. Don’t cancel on your girly night in because you’d rather watch a movie with your partner, or don’t stop going on your early morning walks because you’d rather sleep in and cuddle with your partner. Equally, don’t get upset when your partner chooses his friends over a night in with you. Spending time apart is healthy and when you have been apart for a while you start to really appreciate each other and look forward to seeing them again.

How to not loose yourself in a relationship

Make sure your not making all of the compromises

It can be very easy to try and do everything you can to make your partner happy and to ‘mould’ yourself into their perfect person, but don’t do this. The key to a healthy relationship is to compromise, but this must be equal. Your bound to be different people and share different traits, but you shouldn’t expect each other to change or loose a trait to benefit your relationship, you should accept the fact you are different and compromise to find love that suits you both. Giving too much of yourself to please someone else is unhealthy, your suppose to grow in a relationship.

Have your own personal goals

When you were alone and single you were working on yourself, working to make yourself a life you wanted to live. I get that you are likely to be so happy about your relationship that all of this will fly out the window, after one date you will be ready to plan the next one tomorrow, I’ve been there, I understand, but don’t loose sight in the life you have outside of your relationship, a healthy relationship is meant to make the both of you thrive and achieve anything together and on your own. Loosing yourself should never be the price of not being alone.

How to not loose yourself in a relationship

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